DIYAM 36

DIYAM Chapter 36
Mother’s Tears

Har muka je gida ina kuka na, though na daina yi da karfi
sai ajjiyar zuciya nake yi. Ina jin Saghir yana cewa “wannan
Sadauki dama naji ance dangin mayu ne, tunda kin

kwallafa shi a ranki ba dole yake yi miki gizo ba? In kuma
da gaske shi din kika gani Allah ya bashi sa’ar yi miki
magana in nuna masa shi karamin dan iska ne” daga ni
har inna ba wanda ya kula shi wanda hakan ya bani
mamaki dan nasan inna bata wuce tayi in dai akan zagin
Sadauki ne. A raina nace “kaji Saghir din nan da son a sani
gaida uwar saurayi a kasuwa”.
A kofar gidan mu yayi packing muka fito, na tsaya ina
kallon gidan da yake holding so much memories, good
memories, Inna ta dauko key a jakarta ta bude gidan ni
kuma na dauko mana jakar mu zan wuce ciki naji Saghir
yana cewa “anan zan barku ne naga kuna daukan kaya?”
Ban kula shi ba sai Inna tace “eh” daga haka itama bata
kara komai ba muka shiga cikin gidan.
Na tsaya a tsakar gida na jingina da bishiya ina karewa
gidan kallo, ko ina yayi datti dukun dukun. Inna ta bude
dakin ta ta shiga sai ta dauko key din dakin baffa shima
tazo ta bude. Cikin dakunan basu yi datti sosai ba. Na
zauna akan kujera ina tambayarta “Inna anan zamu zauna
ko? Ba zamu koma gidan Alhaji Babba ba ko?” Eh kawai
tace min sai ta dauki kayan shara ta tafi ta fara share
dakin baffa. Na taso na biyo ta zan taya ta tace “ke da
baki da lfy kiyi zamanki kawai” amma sai naki, tana share
yana ni kuma ina karkade kurar kan furnitures, a haka
muka gama gara cikin daki da palon sa, muka wanke
toilet dinsa na palo sannan sai gasu Mama sunzo ita da
yammatan ta da yake ranar weekend ne babu school, su
suka karasa aikin tsakar gida da kitchen da garage.
Dakunan umma kuma aka rufo su muka zauna a palon
Baffa muka ci abincin da Mama ta taho mana dashi
sannan Mama da Inna suka fita su kace zasu je gidan
Alhaji Babba.
Bayan sun tafi ne Rumaisa take tambayata “Diyam, bani
labarin yadda haihuwa take, naji Mama tana cewa kinyi
kokari kin haifi yara biyu ke kadai babu taimako, ya kika
ji?” Na girgiza kaina kawai, ni kadai nasan yadda naji,
babu wanda zai gane kuma yadda naji din sai wanda ya
tsinci kansa a irin hakin dana tsinki kaina. Ba kuma nayi
wa Rumaisa fatan shiga halin da na tsinci kaina.
Sai bayan magrib su Inna suka dawo, sun debo duk kayan
Inna da na Asma’u, amma duk naga rayukansu a bace
suke daga dukkan alamu ba rabuwar arziki akayi ba.
Asma’u ta shigo tana ta tsallen murnar dawowa gida, tace
“Adda ina son gidan nan wallahi, nafi son muyi zaman mu
anan dani dake da inna”.
Washegari muka yi breakfast da yan kudaden da Mama ta
bamu da zata tafi, bayan nan kuma sai Inna ta fita can sai
gata ta dawo da dillaliya, suka shiga dakinta suna ta
cinikin kaya ni dai ban bisu ba, daga baya matar ta fita sai
gata ta dawo da maza suna ta jidon kayan dakin inna. Set
din gadonta, set din kujerunta, kayan kallon ta kai hatta
labulayenta sai da aka fita dasu. Katifar dakin mu ce
kawai aka kawo nan dakin Baffa sai sauran tarkace kuma
ta saka almajirai suka tattara ta zuba su a dakin soro. Sai
aka share dakin kuma aka rufe shi. Naje na leka dakin
Ummah ta taga naga yana nan yadda yake ko kayanta ba’a
kwashe ba. Da daddare naga Inna ta zauna tana ta lissafin
kudi.
Kafin sati ya zagayo mun samu tenants a gidan mu, sai
akayi yar karamar katanga a tsakanin mu for privacy.
Mata da miji ne da kananan yayansu guda biyu Iman da
Saudat, da zasu tare sai sukayi fenti suka hada harda
gurin mu suka yi mana. Matar mai kirki, irin masu son
shiga mutanen nan ce dan tun da suka zo data gama
abinda taje yi zata zagayo gurin mu muyi ta hira, in mijin
ya siyo wa yayansa wani abu kuwa sai kiga ta dibo ta
bawa Asma’u.
Kudin kayan da inna ta siyar, sai ga Mama tazo ta dauke
ta suka fita sai gasu sun dawo da lodin kaya, tun daga
kan shinkafa har zuwa ashana, sabulan wanka dana wanki
kala kala, har da biscuits da sweets da bobo na yara, ta
saka aka buga mata runfa daga gefe ta jibge kayan ni na
dauka kayan amfanin mune har ina lissafin watannin da
zamuyi muna amfani dasu sai naji ta tura Asma’u duk
makotan mu ta gaya musu tana siyar da kaya. Kwanon
shinkafa kanon fulawa, har gwangwani daya in kana so
zata auna maka, manja man gyada barkono babu abinda
Inna bata siyarwa. Ta mayar da Asma’u kuma former
school dinta, da yake tsohuwar dalibar suce ba’a siya
mata form da uniform ba kawai books aka siya mata sai
kudin makaranta wanda a take Inna ta biya, Asma’u tana
ta murna. Sai naji dadi dana bata wannan shawarar, na
kuma ji dadi data dauka.

A bangare na kuwa tunda muka koma gida kullum sai
wata makociyar mu ta shigo tayi min wankan jego,
wankan runhu take yi min inyi ta kuka wai zafi amma ni
kaina nasan inajin dadin wankan. Sosai na warware na
dawo haiyacina karfina ya dawo jikina. Inna kullum tana
diban kudi ta siyo min nama ta dafa minmai romo ta saka
in chinye in shanye romon, ga tuwo zatayi min da dare da
safe ta dumama min. Har addu’a nake Allah kar ya kawo
karshen wannan zaman nawa. Amma ina….
Tunda muka zo gida babu wanda ya kara bibiyar mu a
cikin yan uwanmu, Saghir ko mai kama dashi ban gani ba,
hatta aunty Fatima bata zo ba sai mama ce kadai take
ziyartaru tana duba lafiya ta. Ta gaya mana itama duk sun
daina kulata kuma suna ta surutun wai dan karayar arziki
ta samu Alhaji Babba shi yasa muka juya masa baya,
bayan mu abinda yayi mana bayan rasuwar Baffa ya dauko
mu ya rike mu ya aurar dani ga dansa mafi soyuwa a
gurinsa amma duk bamu gani ba saboda mun zama
butulu. Inna tace “Allah ai shi yasan abinda zuciyar
bayinsa”.
Sai da mukayi wata uku a haka, har na gama wanka duk
da cewa na wata biyu akayi min. Ranar nan muna zaune
da maman iman muna cin wake da shinkafa sai najiyo
Inna tana waya, daga jin sunan data ambata nasan kiran
daga Kollere ne, ai kuwa tana gama wa naga jikinta yayi
sanyi tace min “Hardo ne. Yace yana neman mu duk a
Kollere ranar asabar” tun daga nan naji duk wutar jikina ta
dauke. Washegari kuwa dai zazzaɓi. Ranar asabar da
assuba Mama tazo tare da driver suka dauke mu ni da
Inna muka bar Asma’u a gurin maman Iman. A hanya nayi
kwanciya ta a mota trying so hard not to think about what
the outcome of the meeting might be.
Muna zuwa muka tarar already su Alhaji Babba, kawu Isa,
Aunty Fatima da kuma Saghir suna can. Tun kafin mu
gama gaishe da Hardo ya fara fada. “Yanzu wato tun kafin
in bar duniya har kanku ya rarrabu irin haka? Har
zumuncin ku ya tarwatse har haka? Har son zuciya ta son
yayanku ya rufe muku ido kun manta da yanuwantakar da
take tsakanin ku? Kun manta da tarbiyyar da ni da inno
muka baku?” Ni dai ina rakube dama daga can bakin
kofar shiga dakinsa, na hango Saghir shima a can daya
end din su kuma iyayen mu suna tsakiya. Sai daya gama
fadansa sannan yace a tsara masa abinda ya faru, kawu
Isa ne yayi bayanin haihuwata da rasuwar twins da kuma
abinda ya sami Alhaji Babba na gobara, duk da cewa duk
Hardo yasan wannan, sai kuma yayi bayanin shi Saghir
abinda yace da kuma ni abinda nace, ya kara da cewa
“mu abinda ya bamu haushi shine yadda Amina ta rufe
idonta ta goyi bayan Diyam, bayan kowa yasan tsakanin
mata da miji sai Allah babu ta yadda za’a gane mai
gaskiya a cikin su. Kawai ta hana yarinyar komawa gidan
mijinta ba tare da anyi bincike ba. Sannan kuma ta hada
kayan ta ta bar gidan Alhaji Babba a lokacin da yake tsaka
da bukatar kulawar yan uwansa, ta koma gidan marigayi
ta bude ta kafa zaman kanta. Wannan ne yasa muma
muka zare ta daga jikin mu”.
Hardo ya hada su gaba-daya ya wanke su, yace da mai
gaskiya da marar gaskiya duk a gurinsa masu laifi ne,
sannan yace “ni yanzu zan yanke hukunci, sai kuma inga
wanda a cikin ku zai nuna min cewa ya girma yanzu yayi
ya’ya kuma ni bani da iko akan ya’yansa” ya fada yana
kallon Inna data sunkuyar da kanta kasa. Ya nuna ni yace
“Haleema” nace “na’am” yace “zaki koma gidan mijinki” na
runtse ido hawayena yana zubo wa. Ya dora “uwani zata
biku ku cigaba da zama tare kamar wancan karon. Zan
gaya mata cewa ta saka ido sosai a kanka kai Saghir ko
sau daya ta tabbatar da maganar Halima ni da kaina zan
karbi takardar ta a hannunka. Sannan abu na gaba shine
zaka saka ta a makaranta, zata karasa karatunta na
secondary inta gama kuma in kun daidaita a tsakanin ku
sai ta cigaba. Ka fahimta?” Saghir yayi gyaran murya yace
“na fahimta Hardo, kuma ina godiya” Hardo ya juyo kaina
yace “ke fa Halima? Kin fahimta?” Na gyada kaina, yace
“ki bude baki kiyi magana mana?” Sai na bare baki na saka
kuka. Nan take ya koreni daga dakin yace in tafi cikin gida.
Anan muka kwana, naga Inna ta dan shiga yan’uwanta
suna magana sama sama. Ni kuwa babu wanda na kula
ina kudundune ina zazzaɓi. Da daddare wai sai ga kira
inje inji Saghir yana waje, na tashi naga duk suna kallona
dan haka na saka hijab na fita, na dan tsaya a soro na
bata lokaci sai na dawo gida nayi kwanciya ta.
Da safe kowa ya shirya zamu tafi, mukayi sallama da
mutan gida ina fitowa waje na hango Saghir a tsaye a jikin
motar dasuka zo da ita ya harde kafafu yana kada key, na
dauke kaina zan wuce yace “babu gaisuwa?” Na juya baya
naga kawu Isa yana kallon mu sai na gaishe shi ciki ciki,
ya amsa yana murmushi yace “in kin koma gida ki shirya
jibi zan zo mu tafi” na faki ido na jefa masa harara na
wuce. A raina nace “munafiki”.
Mun koma gida da kwana biyu kuwa sai gashi da safe wai
in fito mu tafi. Na koma nayi kwanciya ta Inna tace “tashi
ki dauki mayafinki ku tafi, sauran kayanki zan hado miki in
aiko miki dasu” na fara kuka, sai ta zauna kusa dani ta
jawo ni jikinta tace “kiyi hakuri Diyam, nasan wannan duk
laifina ne dan tun farko ni na bada kofa har akayi miki
auren nan, yanzu kuma babu yadda zanyi tunda igiyar
auren ba a hannuna take ba. Kiyi hakuri kinji?” Sai naga
kwalla a idonta, nayi saurin goge hawayena ina gyada kai,
ta dauko sabuwar waya a cikin kwalinta da sim card ta
miko min tace “tun ranar nan na siyo miki wata. Ki tafi da
ita, duk halin da kike ciki ki kirani ko ki kira Hafsa ki gaya
mana. Uwanin ma munyi waya da ita tace min itama yau
zata je. Ki yi ta addu’a kina gaya wa Ubangiji kukan ki, shi
kadai ne zai zaba miki abu mafi alkhairi a rayuwar ki”.
A mota na tarar dashi a zaune yana jin kida, na kai hannu
zan bude baya sai ya danna lock ya rufe, dole na na shiga
gaba yaja motar ba tare daya ce min komai ba. Ina ta
kuka na kasa kasa har mukayi nisa muka kusa unguwar
sannan yace “wallahi ko kiyi shiru da kukan nan ko kuma
in sauke ki a gurin nan” nayi shirun tunda nasan ba
karamin aikinsa bane ya saukeni a wajen.
A bakin gate ya ajiye ni, ina fitowa ya ja motarsa yayi
gaba. Na shiga gidan ni kadai kamar mayya. Maigadi ya
taso ya muka gaisa na bude palo na ganshi kamar wanda
akayi yakin badar a ciki, kaca kaca, ga used plates nan
ko’ina duk sun bushe. Bedrooms ne kadai masu dan kyau
suma bawai gyarawa akayi ba amma dai ba’a bata su ba.
Na lura cewa abubuwa da yawa were missing a gidan,
daga dukkan alamu kayan gidan su suka koma source of
income na Saghir. Na kunna tv naga lafiyar ta kalau,na
fara tattara gidan kenan naji a tv an sako wakar Westlife
ta coast to coast “my Love”
An empty street, An empty house, A hole inside my heart,
I’m all alone The rooms are getting smaller. I wonder
how, I wonder why, I wonder where they are, The days we
had, The songs we sang together Oh yeah
And all my love I’m holding on forever, Reaching for the
love that seems so far, So I say a little prayer, And hope
my dreams will take me there, Where the skies are blue
To see you once again, my love, Over seas from coast to
coast, To find the place I love the most Where the fields
are green To see you once again, my love
To hold you in my arms, To promise you my love, To tell
you from my heart You’re all I’m thinking of. And reaching
for the love that seems so far……..
Sai naji kamar dani suke a wakar with Sadauki as my
faraway love. Na zauna akan kujera na kama sana’ar tawa
ta kuka. Ina cikin yi uwani tayi sallama ta shigo, sai na
tashi da gudu naje na rungume ta.
Tare muka gyara gidan gaba-daya, sannan uwani ta fitar
da kudi daga aljihunta ta bawa maigadi yayo mana cefane
mukayi girki. Muna gamawa sai ga Saghir yazo ya zauna a
palo suna gaisawa da uwani sannan ya ce min “kawo min
abinci” Sai na juya ina mamakin karfin hali irin na Saghir,
kai da baka bada kudin cefane ba ina kai ina neman
abinci? Ina kallonsa ya dauki wayata ya duba, sai naga ya
daddanna ya ajiye. Da dare na fito daga wanka ina shirin
kwanciya waya ta tayi kara. Na dauka ina duba number
din dan number inna da ta Mama kawai nsyi saving dazu a
gurin uwani. Na dauka naji muryar Saghir “ki kawo min
ruwa dakina” na ajiye wayar nayi tsaki. Har zan kwanta sai
kuma na saka hijab dina na dauko ruwan naje na kai
masa. Yana kwance ya kashe fitila ya rufa da bargo, na
ajiye ruwan ba tare dana ce masa komai ba. Zan fita yace
“Diyam” na juyo ina kallonsa ya nuna kusa dani a kan gado
yace “come here” na watsa masa harara na juya yace “kin
san dai hakkina ne ko?” Na juyo nace “kai wanne daga
cikin hakkokin ka ka sauke?” Yace “ki bani chance ki gani.
Kuma nasan so far I have been trying my best” na fara
tunanin wanne ne best din nasa. Sai ji nayi yace “zanyi
Allah ya isa in baki zo ba” na juya da sauri ina kallonsa
nace cikin mamaki “are you for real?” Ya daga kafada
yace “bani da wani choice ai, ina bukatar ki kin ki bani,
bazan iya miki dole ba so my only choice is to do Allah ya
isa, ta rago” na juyo kamar wadda aka saka wa remote ina
tunanin yadda aljanna ta take kasan kafarsa amma a
lokacin babu abinda nake so irin in shake kyakykyawan
wuyansa har sai ya daina numfashi. Na zauna a bakin
gado na juya masa baya ina jin hawayena yana zuba a
cinyoyi na, ina jinsa ya matso ya zare rigata sannan ya
jawo ni zuwa jikinsa, ina jinsa yayi duk abinda yake ganin
zai iya yayin da ni kuma kukana yake kara tsananta har ya
gama abinsa. Ya sake ni yana mayar da numfashi. Na
mike zaune na jawo rigata na saka ba tare dana kalleshi
ba na mike sai ji nayi yace “shikenan kuma? Ko dan curdle
din nan ma, irin falling asleep together din nan na masu
aure babu, na juyo ina kallonsa da kumburarrun
idanuwana, yayi murmushi nace “shima in banzo ba Allah
ya isan zaka yi?” Yace “well, yes” na juyo na dawo na
kwanta. Ya matso da pillon sa kusa dani ya jawo ni jikinsa
sannan ya jawo bargo ya rufe mu.